In this tidal wave of events that the past two years has been, sometimes I lose you in the swirling of the maelstrom.
Sometimes, Bo's illness and absence are fresher, my father's - well, everything about dad - bears down on me and other times, I see John's picture with his wife or daughter and I cannot believe I will never see him again. Sometimes you, Great Spirit, get lost in the shuffle.
And then I see your face, those dear brown eyes, and it all comes flooding back-
Oh Luke, at times I am so crushed with missing you and feeling that I let you down, it's a terrible feeling, and not how I want to remember you.
So on days like today, when I come to this blog and the first thing I see is your dear sweet face, turned to look at me with the tenderness and that..searching look, the one that always seemed to say "I love you, you strange woman you"...I can say to once again, as I have for so many years, in so many situation - Thank you, Braveheart. For everything you did for me and all you helped me through, I believe your sacrifice at the end came from somewhere above, somewhere that ultimately was looking out for me and my future, for the larger picture. And oh, but She moves in mysterious ways! I just wanted to tell you, as I always promised you in our too-short time together - I am fine, I am well, it is all getting better.
Luke -you brought me so much joy....and ultimately, so much wisdom.
Till the next time,
love, Mom
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